Numbers in 2010 showed that 42% of online gamers were female. And 100% of politicians were morons. That number has somehow risen to an incredibly impossible 124% of politicians being morons.

Wake up in the morning (or afternoon, depending on the day). Check the news to see how much more downhill the world seems to be headed. Only to find out that the world seems to be headed backwards, at least, if you were gauge your idea of the world from the point-of-view of Republicans. Now they’re in fits because apparently one Colleen Lachowisz, a woman running for Senate in Maine, plays World of Warcraft.

She is tainting our kids with her filthy left-wing video games!

So… Are they angry because they’re Republicans and backwards, or that she’s a woman, or that she’s playing video games? Because none of those things seem out of the realm of possibility. It is understandable if her entire waking life was dedicated to playing this game, but it doesn’t seem to be, considering that most people who spend the majority of their free time playing video games are probably not aspiring to enter the political field. And good for them. It’s just like how most online film bloggers who rant about movies will probably never actually make a movie themselves.

Quite possibly the funniest part of this is that they think her playing video games leads to her living a “bizarre double life”. Just how out of touch are these wackos? Are these really people you want representing you, the average person who most likely does play video games, or has, you know, other hobbies that the Republicans might find would cause you live a “bizarre double life”?

Doesn’t Vladimir Putin test out race cars and take journalists hunting (where he apparently uses those journalists as the game)? Rick Santorum bowls? Impossible! How about calling out Barack Obama for playing pool? Everyone knows Obama lives a double-life as an un-American socialist Muslim sympathizer. Romney apparently loves water sports. Or what about Mitt Romney’s bizarre double-life as a Presidential candidate? What’s the deal with that?

But a woman playing video games? Hell no. We can’t have that.

Hey, how about all of those Catholic priests that live double-lives as child molesters? Or how about all those in politics who have ever lead double-lives as Wall Street bankers? The politicians that lead a double-life of extramarital sex offenders? The police officers who lead double-lives as lazy-ass power-hungry donut-eaters? Or how about all those idiots who masquerade as politicians, and all of those politicians who masquerade as intelligent people?

It’s a god damn hobby she has, you idiots. Unless Colleen starts believing she is an Orc in real life and starts bashing people over the head (which most politicians could use, anyway), why is this even a problem? And even if she did spend all of her free time playing World of Warcraft, what’s the difference? You assholes aren’t getting things done either way. Instead of attacking someone’s penchant for video games, why not try to fix some fucking problems?

Aren’t these the fools that used actor, director and real-life celebrity Clint Eastwood (the guy who initially found fame killing people in his movies and made a life out of portraying the lives of others) as a major speaker at the Republican National Convention? You know, when he talked to an empty chair? Clint Eastwood, for one night only: an actor leading a double-life as a non-actor. It was honestly a bit disheartening to watch. Do we give this man a break, even if he was doing the worst performance of his career?

Oscar-worthy performance, folks.

Not to mention how apt that scene was, illustrating how ludicrous and ridiculous politics in America has become: the stereotypical Republican – white, old, senile, out-of-touch, and non-acting – talking to a stereotypical Democrat – empty, nonexistent, wooden, and never there – and ‘arguing’ about, well, nothing.

And this row over a woman video gamer running for Senate has illustrated, once again, why we’re all idiots for paying attention to this god awful circus. Out-of-touch Maine Republicans calling out a woman for playing World of Warcraft.

Technology hasn’t progressed that far (yet) that the line between fact and fiction has been completely erased. Of course, we’re talking about regular people here, and not politicians, whose sole purpose seems to be to concoct fact from complete fiction. Men and women whose jobs are to be to lie out of their asses and make up stuff because apparently fact-checking is a thing of the past and the responsibility of us regular folks.

This rant written by a non-feminist, but one who is capable of facing reality. Parts of it, anyway.


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